Oral Health: It's No Laughing Matter
Published by Tom at 6/23/2006 12:25:00 AM.
Speeding to the eastern end of the country on one of England’s fastest trains, I realized that within five minutes of meeting a friend of a friend I’m telling her about my dental history. Am I boring? Have I become that person, the very self-deprecating, pity-partying, attention hound whom I loathe?
Halfway across the world and a week and a half later, I was vulnerable: I was in a reluctant sprawl in my dentist’s office with a dentist to my right and an oral hygienist to my left. I was being prodded, poked, and probed by hooked metallic objects that would probably be more suitable in husbandry than in dentistry. The dentist made noises of intrigue during the process, lots of “hmms” and “mmhmms.” Allow me to explain why this is noteworthy.
Due to my excessively strange sense of humor, I have decided that having a minor inflammation of the gums was simultaneously one of the more hilarious and equally terrifying diseases in the field of medicine. No, it’s not gangrene, but it’s no scraped knee either.
I don’t have bad hygiene habits, either. Please, for the love of God, don’t think that. I can brush, floss, and rinse with the rest of them. I think I have bad genes. My uncle, coincidentally (and irrelevantly) a Californian, has had the infliction as well.
It seems to be like a right of passage to us Hanlons. We’re a good people, if you can look past our dental shortcomings.
On the bright side, though, I don’t have gingivitis. I have minor irritation and that’s it. I’ll keep fighting the good fight, don’t you worry about me.
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Halfway across the world and a week and a half later, I was vulnerable: I was in a reluctant sprawl in my dentist’s office with a dentist to my right and an oral hygienist to my left. I was being prodded, poked, and probed by hooked metallic objects that would probably be more suitable in husbandry than in dentistry. The dentist made noises of intrigue during the process, lots of “hmms” and “mmhmms.” Allow me to explain why this is noteworthy.
Due to my excessively strange sense of humor, I have decided that having a minor inflammation of the gums was simultaneously one of the more hilarious and equally terrifying diseases in the field of medicine. No, it’s not gangrene, but it’s no scraped knee either.
I don’t have bad hygiene habits, either. Please, for the love of God, don’t think that. I can brush, floss, and rinse with the rest of them. I think I have bad genes. My uncle, coincidentally (and irrelevantly) a Californian, has had the infliction as well.
It seems to be like a right of passage to us Hanlons. We’re a good people, if you can look past our dental shortcomings.
On the bright side, though, I don’t have gingivitis. I have minor irritation and that’s it. I’ll keep fighting the good fight, don’t you worry about me.
Seems I made a wrong turn on the internet and ended up here. I like the new design. I suppose you'll stop writing after a month again, thereby frustrating the few readers you managed to accrue during that time. It will be a nice run, I suppose. Godspeed.